Being a Viking also means that the baby will grow up to be 73 percent more attractive than the average human. I know this is true because when I am in Sweden I want to bite 73 percent more girls than when I am in London.
I have decided that when I get a baby, I will get either a Viking one so that it can take me raping and pillaging too, or a Chinese one so that I can call it Bau Bau and give it too much rice.
I don't want a normal baby because they look like horrible potatoes.
Training Bau Bau would also give me a sense of rewards. For example, I could teach Bau Bau how to speak, about the birds and the bees and, most importantly, cage fighting.
Bau Bau's rich life would be my rewards and Bau Bau's cage fighting victories would be my cage fighting victories.
I think I'd be a good parent because I am kind to animals. (Once I kept a bug for three years). (It died after two days). I also have money from working at an office so I can pay for rice when Bau Bau is hungry and bandages when I hurt Bau Bau.
I just have to find Bau Bau's mother and bite her. (That's how you make babies).
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